Ready to Gobble ‘Til You Giggle? Thanksgiving 2025 is here—and so is the laughter! If you’re roasting the turkey or just roasting your relatives, these 1100+ funny Thanksgiving quotes will spice up your holiday with wit, warmth, and a whole lot of gravy-flavored humor.
From hilarious family moments to food comas and awkward dinner table conversations, we’ve got the perfect quotes to keep icons high and bellies shaking.
Share them in your captions, toasts, or texts and turn this Turkey Day into a comedy feast. Let’s be thankful… for laughter!
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes for a Smile
- 😂 I’m just here for the pie and passive-aggressive family comments
- 🦃 Turkey: the only bird that gets stuffed and roasted in front of its whole family
- 🧈 Everything tastes better with butter… especially awkward conversations
- 🥧 If calories count on Thanksgiving, I’m counting wrong
- 😄 Gratitude is great, but gravy is greater
- 🛋️ Gobble ’til you wobble—then claim the comfiest spot on the couch
- 🥴 I came. I saw. I overate.
- 👖 Thanksgiving: when jeans become emotional support clothing
- 🍽️ Leftovers are proof that even food can have commitment issues
- 💬 I practice gratitude every time someone brings me mashed potatoes
- 🦃 Don’t be a turkey—be thankful
- 🥄 My favorite utensil is the ladle… full of stuffing
- 📺 Thanksgiving: when football is watched by people pretending to understand it
- 😋 Come for the turkey, stay for the stuffing
- 🫃 Thanksgiving calories don’t count if you eat standing up
Humor Funny Thanksgiving Quotes
- 🦃 Thanksgiving: the day we honor food more than fitness
- 🤪 I only run on Thanksgiving… to the kitchen
- 🛌 Why does Thanksgiving dinner take 18 hours to prepare and 18 minutes to eat?
- 🎉 I’m thankful for stretchy pants and bad decisions
- 👨👩👧👦 Family gatherings: the original Hunger Games
- 🍷 Wine pairs perfectly with family drama
- 🔥 If you’re reading this, bring rolls
- 😬 That moment when you realize the turkey was supposed to be thawed yesterday
- 🤭 Thanksgiving: when your fridge becomes a time capsule
- 🤰 Overstuffed is a personality trait today
- 🤷♂️ I’m just here to emotionally support the turkey
- 🧄 Garlic mashed potatoes > therapy
- 🍗 Please pass the sarcasm with the cranberry sauce
- 🥱 Wake me up when the pie is served
- 🧂 Tis the season for salty stuffing and salty relatives
Short Funny Thanksgiving Quotes
- 🦃 Talk turkey to me
- 🍽️ Feast mode: activated
- 🤤 I’m pie-curious
- 😵 Too full to function
- 😂 Give thanks, then give snacks
- 🥧 Pie before guys
- 🛋️ Let’s get basted
- 🍗 Gobble gobble till you wobble
- 🧦 Stuffing: the real MVP
- 😬 Nap > family debate
- 🎯 Target: leftover stuffing
- 🧈 Gravy is my love language
- 🤷♀️ Diet starts next year
- 🧃 Thankful for juice… fermented juice
- 📦 Send leftovers, not opinions
Joke Funny Thanksgiving Quotes
- 😂 What did the turkey say to the computer? Google, google!
- 🦃 Why did the cranberries turn red? They saw the turkey dressing
- 😆 What do you get when you cross a turkey and a ghost? A poultry-geist
- 🧠 What sound does a limping turkey make? Wobble wobble
- 🤣 What kind of music do pilgrims like? Plymouth rock
- 🍽️ Why did the turkey join a band? It had the drumsticks
- 😜 Why was the turkey at the comedy club? He was roasted
- 👨🍳 What did the cook say after ruining Thanksgiving dinner? Oh, gravy!
- 🦴 Why was the wishbone so popular? It always got pulled in two directions
- 😲 How do you keep your pants up on Thanksgiving? With the turkey’s belt
- 🧄 Why don’t you put the turkey next to the dessert? Because it will gobble it up
- 🍷 Why did everyone avoid the cranberry sauce? It was too jell-o-us
- 🎤 What’s a turkey’s favorite type of comedy? Deadpan
- 🧼 Why don’t turkeys use soap? They already come pre-washed
- 💼 What do turkeys do for work? They’re poultry in motion
Jokes Funny Thanksgiving Quotes for a Smile
- 😁 Thanksgiving: when your belt becomes optional
- 🍽️ Let’s get stuffed
- 🦃 I’m thankful for naps and carbs
- 😂 Why did the turkey cross the road? It was Thanksgiving, and it was running for its life
- 🥴 If I were a turkey, I’d hide too
- 🤤 Happiness is a warm roll with butter
- 🛋️ Football: the background noise to my food coma
- 👨👩👧👦 Thanksgiving: where family comes to feast and feud
- 🍗 Don’t mind me—just basting in glory
- 🥧 Pie is temporary, but bloating is eternal
- 🧂 Seasoning the turkey like I season my mood—extra salty
- 😬 Pass the passive aggression with the peas
- 💬 Small talk and stuffing: both hard to swallow
- 🕰️ Turkey time is the only time that matters today
- 🎯 Goal: survive dinner without being asked about life plans
funny thanksgiving messages
“Thanksgiving: the one day where stretching pants is considered formal wear.”
“Eat turkey, nap hard, repeat—that’s my kind of holiday tradition.”
“Thanksgiving calories? Sorry, they don’t count if you eat standing up.”
“I came, I ate, I conquered… and then I needed a nap.”
“Pumpkin pie: proof that happiness can be served in slices.”
“Thanksgiving is basically Black Friday carb-loading practice.”
“May your turkey be juicy, your pie endless, and your relatives tolerable.”
“Nothing says family bonding like fighting over the last dinner roll.”
“Gratitude is important… but so is gravy.”
“Thanksgiving is just Friendsgiving with more awkward family questions.”
“Warning: I run on turkey and sarcasm today.”
“Keep calm and pass the stuffing (before I lose it).”
“Thanksgiving: the official day of pretending you like Aunt Linda’s casserole.”
“I’m just here for the mashed potatoes and gossip.”
“Thanksgiving is when you realize your family tree has a few nuts—and they all showed up.”
🦃 Thanksgiving Funny Quotes
- “Thanksgiving is the day I count my blessings—and my calories.”
- “Turkey: the only bird people are excited to see stuffed.”
- “Thanksgiving dinner is just a warm-up for Black Friday shopping cardio.”
- “I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.”
- “Thanksgiving: when your belt becomes the true MVP.”
- “Leftovers are proof that Thanksgiving is the gift that keeps on giving.”
- “Pumpkin pie is the real reason for the season.”
- “Thanksgiving: when the turkey isn’t the only one getting roasted.”
- “The only marathon I’m running is from the couch to the fridge.”
- “Calories don’t count on holidays—especially Thanksgiving.”
- “Thanksgiving: the holiday that proves elastic waistbands were a genius invention.”
- “The turkey may be stuffed, but so am I.”
- “I practice gratitude daily—especially for mashed potatoes.”
- “Thanksgiving is the perfect mix of family drama and pie.”
- “Eat, nap, repeat. That’s my Thanksgiving workout plan.”
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes 🦃🍂
- “Thanksgiving—bringing out the chef in people who only use their oven as extra storage.”
- “Thanksgiving calories don’t count… right? Asking for my stretchy pants.”
- “Keep calm and pass the gravy.”
- “Turkey: the only animal celebrated by being stuffed inside and outside.”
- “Thanksgiving is the day I count my blessings—and then lose count after my third slice of pie.”
- “Nothing says Thanksgiving like a family fight over politics and the last dinner roll.”
- “Thanksgiving: the annual competition of who can nap the longest after eating.”
- “Pumpkin pie is just the universe’s way of apologizing for winter.”
- “Thanksgiving is when I pretend I know how to carve a turkey.”
- “I’m thankful for elastic waistbands and forgiving sweaters.”
- “Thanksgiving leftovers: because one day of overeating just isn’t enough.”
- “Thanksgiving is basically pre-Christmas training.”
- “A balanced Thanksgiving meal is a slice of pie in each hand.”
- “You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy pie—and that’s basically the same thing.”
- “Thanksgiving—where wine and gravy count as side dishes.”
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes for Friends
- 👫 Friendsgiving: because family isn’t always by blood
- 🥧 You’re the pumpkin to my pie
- 🥂 Thankful for you and cheap wine
- 🍗 You bring the stuffing, I’ll bring the sass
- 🧦 Let’s be honest, we came for the food and stayed for the memes
- 🎉 Grateful for friends who pretend I can cook
- 🛋️ BFFs: Best Friends at the Feast
- 😂 My friends are like gravy—always extra and everywhere
- 🤷♀️ Friendship is sharing the last slice
- 📸 We didn’t eat first—we took pictures first
- 🥰 Friends don’t let friends skip dessert
- 🧈 Our friendship is smoother than mashed potatoes
- 🧄 Thankful for the friends who bring garlic bread
- 🛍️ Friendsgiving rule #1: leftovers go to the best meme-sharer
- 🫶 You make Thanksgiving way less awkward
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes for Kids
- 🦃 Why did the turkey sit on the drumstick? It wanted to play music!
- 😆 Knock knock! Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce eat already!
- 🍗 Mom says eat veggies—I say pass the pie!
- 😂 What’s the turkey’s favorite dessert? Peach gobbler!
- 🥔 Mashed potatoes are my icon animal
- 🤪 I yam what I yam
- 🍬 Thanksgiving: the Halloween of food
- 🐥 Don’t trust a skinny turkey
- 🧁 My favorite color is gravy
- 🤤 I dream of pie, not sugarplums
- 🦴 I wish bones really granted wishes
- 🤓 Pilgrims were the OG foodies
- 🥄 Spoon me some stuffing
- 🛌 Eat, nap, repeat
Funny Thanksgiving Wishes 🦃😂
- Happy Turkey Day! May your pants be stretchy and your relatives stay in their lanes.”
- Hope your Thanksgiving is filled with food so good you forget all about your diet!”
- Happy Thanksgiving—may your turkey be moist, your wine be strong, and your family drama be mild.”
- Thanksgiving: the only day it’s acceptable to replace ‘How are you?’ with ‘What’s in the oven?’”
- Eat, nap, repeat—that’s my Thanksgiving workout plan for you!”
- Hope your gravy is smooth, your pie crust flaky, and your uncle’s jokes less awkward than last year.”
- Happy Thanksgiving! May your stuffing be delicious and your Wi-Fi strong enough to avoid relatives.”
- Calories don’t count on Thanksgiving. You’re welcome!”
- Here’s to a holiday where the bird gets roasted and so do half the relatives.”
- Wishing you a Thanksgiving as sweet as pie—and as chaotic as a family group chat.”
- May your feast be endless and your dishes magically disappear themselves.”
- Happy Thanksgiving—remember, it’s not overeating, it’s just pre-Christmas training.”
- Hoping your turkey is juicy, your mashed potatoes lump-free, and your stretchy pants ready for action.”
- Eat like nobody’s watching… because they’re too busy judging the turkey.”
- Thanksgiving: proof that we can all get along as long as there’s pie.”
🦃 Funny Thanksgiving Sayings
- Thanksgiving: the only time eating an entire pie by yourself is considered a family tradition.”
- Talk turkey to me.”
- Gobble till you wobble.”
- I’m just here for the mashed potatoes.”
- Calories don’t count on Thanksgiving— it’s science.”
- Stuffing is just edible pillows for your soul.”
- You know you’re full when you can’t button your pants and don’t even care.”
- Thankful, blessed, and way too obsessed with pumpkin pie.”
- Thanksgiving: the art of seeing how much food your plate can hold without collapsing.”
- Save the neck for me, Clark!”
- Leftovers are proof that Thanksgiving is the gift that keeps on giving.”
- Nothing says gratitude like a food coma.”
- Forget Black Friday—Thanksgiving pants are the real deal.”
- Pumpkin spice and turkey thighs.”
- Thanksgiving dinner is like a test— and I always pass with flying gravy.”
Funny Thanksgiving Messages
- 🦃 “Happy Thanksgiving! May your turkey be juicy, your potatoes lump-free, and your stretchy pants forgiving.”
- 🥧 “Thanksgiving calories don’t count… right? Asking for a friend (and my third slice of pie).”
- 🍗 “Let’s give thanks for family, friends, and the fact that no one is judging how much we eat today… hopefully.”
- 🦃 “Happy Turkey Day! May your family drama be low and your gravy supply be endless.”
- 🥧 “Thanksgiving: the one day where eating like a hobbit is socially acceptable. Breakfast, second breakfast, elevenses, lunch, pie, dinner, more pie…”
- 🍴 “Happy Thanksgiving! May your day be filled with laughter, gratitude, and only minor food comas.”
- 🦃 “Turkey is temporary. Leftovers are eternal. Cheers to round two, three, and four!”
- 🥧 “Happy Thanksgiving! Remember—pumpkin pie has vegetables, so technically it’s healthy.”
- 🍗 “Thanksgiving is the only holiday where we celebrate by overeating and calling it tradition. Count me in!”
- 🦃 “May your turkey be moist, your relatives be polite, and your football team actually win for once.”
- 🥧 “Thanksgiving: when you realize your stomach doesn’t have the same storage space as your fridge.”
- 🍴 “Happy Thanksgiving! May your mashed potatoes be smooth and your Wi-Fi stronger than family debates.”
- 🦃 “I’m thankful for elastic waistbands, gravy boats, and pie charts that only include desserts.”
- 🥧 “Happy Thanksgiving! Eat like nobody’s watching… because they’re too busy eating too.”
- 🍗 “Let’s be grateful that Thanksgiving is the official warm-up for Christmas feasting season!”
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes for Letter Board
- 🦃 Gobble till you wobble
- 🧈 Thankful, blessed, and butter obsessed
- 🛋️ Feasting and resting
- 🥧 Eat pie, be kind
- 🧄 Garlic is always in season
- 😴 Nap team captain
- 🧂 Sprinkle gratitude like salt
- 🥣 Leftovers are love
- 😂 I’m just here for the snacks
- 🎯 Food coma loading…
- 🍗 Carb queen/king
- 😆 Give thanks and pass the rolls
- 🛍️ Will trade secrets for stuffing
- 🍷 Gravy over everything
- 😎 Let’s get basted
Conclusion
Thanksgiving is about food, family, and finding the funny in every moment. Whether you’re sharing laughs around the table or just need a reason to smile, these funny Thanksgiving quotes add that perfect twist of humor.
From friends to little ones to letter board one-liners, there’s a laugh for every crowd.
So grab your plate, your pie, and your puns—because laughter is the best leftover.
